I once told someone, to be able to continue my study in English Literature had been my dream back then, and I wrote a writing about it (who knows it actually came true the dream), Only I wasn’t sure enough yet at the time and I was the one held responsible for it. For I sure believe this is the working of conspired universe, I’m glad now I wasn’t giving up the dream, I’m that kind of person who thinks about the things I want, over and over (and most of time, I got what I wanted), even in my sunsconcious mind, when I’m walking, breathing, I bring the passion along, even when I wasn’t yet walking the path as I’m right now, back then, I still had the believe, that the dream would someday come into walking realization, only I didn’t know yet how it would bring me to the currently taken road. Long story short, I believe in this one forceful quote by Paulo Ceulho, the Alchemist, “When you really want something, the universe will conspire.” It happened to me at last, God granted the dream in the least expected way. Now, I have no way to be least excited, if anything, every waking up is a brand new excitement. There I’ll see myself 5 or 7 years from now on, to be the person I wanted to be:
– Prolific writer (in any form, but mainly a novel, because it has been my biggest dream to be a writer.), and
– Lecturer (my mother wanted her children to be lecturers, as she is an English teacher herself, a charming one, and not to mention it is in line with my passion. I have this university to continue my master at, I have promised myself, as it was suggested by Mr.R(andom), if I happened to continue my master there, I’ll take a visit to Dylan Thomas tomb) I know, universe will conspire, I only need to have the believe).
Mr.R(andom) once questioned me, what did I do in 25 years of living (to never for once in a relationship, it seemed so plain and boring a life to him) I really wanted to tell him, it had been a struggling for me to be in this point I’m right now, all those years spent, I regretted nothing, even when at last I had to lose the soul still (only God knows how much I love her, how she means the world to me, how I just randomly checked, just in case there is any worrisome messages from her, you have no idea how big a lost it is to me still). But thank you, you have been the one, who happened to be there in my most darkest time. You have no idea, how thankful I’m for having you at that time, when I thought it was impossible for me to smile, you suggested me to read ‘The Martian‘, it brought me an endless laugher. And your random massage, just when I needed to be all alone, there your random message of ‘oi’ or ‘oioioi’ distracted me (it becomes my nickname then, I guess), it was you and Mr.Ar who made it less a downturn, thank you. Never for once in my life I laughed so hard (at the midnight) and flastered at the same time because of this:
And it was simply the stupidest question for asking me why I care a lot about you, you said I’m one of your best friend, so do you to me okay. I never thanked God enough for having a person in my life, really, you made everything better (If you think I’m preaching you, you got me wrong, okay) but also made me so frustrated for the first time over a person. For another Mr.Ad, who I met recently (not really recently, it was prob 4 months ago). I’ve lost the one I cherished the most in my life in a hospital (I promise myself to never go to the place, ever again, I have enough bad memories there already, that’s why I’m so strict when it comes to foods) I hope you can be the one, a competent doctor, who can save many lives in the future, never ever do a silly thing again okay, not again please, in your life, I’ve partially read Punpun anyway (I was wondering, why they made Punpun looked like that, even when his name speaks cute to me, I’m not really sure, what animals resemble the shape, I guess, a Penguin, don’t you think so? And you never told me it was a rated comic, Good God my eyes) but there is this part that I love the most from the comic
“Anyone who only holds other people back is gonna live an unhappy life. Who cares if you have a dream, right?”
I have been this kind of person who takes it seriously what’s given in hands. Even when it wasn’t easy but there was always a way, and what doesn’t kill you only make you stronger. I’m glad I’m living and walking my dream -not someone else’s. I feel like a complete person already, I have what I want and need, and it is more than enough a granted wish for me. God, for I sure believe, loves me a bit too much. It’s enough, I feel enough, and never feel this enough in my life.
“Tomorrow, will be a better day.”